A Stone In My Shoe

After a considerable time of contemplative reflection, I have come to the conclusion that heaven and hell is here on earth, here right now, not in some mythical destination at the end of our time. Study and experience of life, convince me that we create our own heaven and hell by the thoughts created in our own minds. The journey from ignorance of our divine potential to full realisation, can be a long and tempestuous one.
Education may leave us fit for a life of compliance, but ignorant to our true purpose.
Seeking a life of spiritual refinement requires courage, commitment, and no small amount of faith, I find on a personal level, it is a path I have to take. Increasingly so as I get older.
Recently, I have felt  disillusioned by some self proclaimed spiritual Gurus, Teachers etc. Retreats in Hawaii, Bali, etc., seem to become the norm, a required reverence for the teacher rather than the message.
The questions I have to ask of myself are.. would the teachings be any less valid if taught from an exotic location rather than a cave in a mountain? Should the outward trappings of success of the teacher be a barrier to learning something of value?
Would I embrace the trappings of success if in the same position? Most likely yes.
Would I change under constant reverence from followers? Most likely yes.
Why? Because I, like everyone else am human, with all the faults and frailties that entails.

It may appear at first glance, that my intention is to in some way take a dig at anyone who raises their head above the parapet, in terms of commercialisation of the spirit, that is not entirely the case.
The real reason is to highlight my own frustrations in the pursuit of who I am and indeed where I am going.
Let me try to explain where I am coming from, perhaps it may help both you and I in some simple way. The truth may be in my own inadequacies, my own failings.
Due to the fact my own searches have led me to study more and more teachings over the past thirty odd years, I seem to notice more teachers springing up after having life changing awakenings, becoming suddenly enlightened, and able to guide others on their journeys. I hear and read from some, that the only way to become enlightened is to have an enlightened master to follow, someone to guide one through the various stages when the time is right.

If one person on the planet can be enlightened, can we all potentially not do the same? Are we all not part of the same? Can we make it through our own endeavors?
Surely we all face the same issues, enlightened or not. I find it difficult to believe that any human being can totally negate all negative thoughts and feelings. If a person does not like a line of questioning from someone less enlightened, do they not react within, the same as everyone else; or if you become awakened are those thoughts, emotions totally submerged?
Here is the answer that springs to mind.
If you are in a realisation of what your ultimate purpose in life is, it is up to you, through the power of your own will, strengthened by spiritual knowledge, to be able to suppress the negative and enhance the positive.
Easy to say, but for a person in the midst of a modern lifestyle, how achievable I wonder?
We live in an ever changing world, we need to understand that the old institutions, faiths, philosophies, no longer fulfil the needs as in the past.
My feelings are we need to rely more on our own intuitions to guide us, to ask the questions and reflect on the answers, to assimilate that which resonates with our being.
It is good to listen and learn from others, though not to believe that enlightenment is only for the chosen few. Above all, we..I..need to understand we cannot hold people up as being perfect or faultless, that would be a mistake. That could be a get out clause for us not to do the difficult part, which is to take control of our own lives, to find our way through good intentions and faith to a positive outcome.

I hope if you read this, you will in someway understand where I am coming from. By asking awkward questions of myself (and others), I seek the answers that will satisfy my spirit. I understand as I write, that my frustrations come because of my fear of there being time limits on what I seek. Can it be that awakening and ultimately enlightenment can be had for all, at any moment, without retreating to the mountains or the seclusion of a monastery? That has to be a possibility that I favour.
I have to say from my own point of view,  to try to walk a path less travelled, is sometimes not easy, but it feels right for me at this time.. so on I go, stone in shoe.